Any number of random things can trigger anxiety for me. The current state of circumstances leaves me afraid for what's next from the Czar and Queen. Clearly, they can't actually do anything to keep me from doing what I want, but they can certainly do some harm. From the moment I open my eyes, I fight anxiety. A thought, an image, a phone call, a question... anything can be a trigger.
Today, I'm having to make the conscious decision, over and over, to remember that no final choices need to be made today. No consequences must be met today. I can be ok today. It's a real sense of captivity and slavery you feel when every corner, every unknown poses a threat. I have to make a choice right now. And again. And again.
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